Feeling small, an art journal page

 
Hey bloggers! 
Today I am sharing a page out of my art journal and 
I am curious, do you share emotions in your art journals?

Jan 2013 109

It wasn't my intention when I started my page to make my girl look so sad
and so small in comparison to the page. I guess it was just a reflection of what
I was feeling at the time. I tried several times to draw her differently but she still 
came out looking so sad.

Jan 2013 052

Why so sad? Well for the past year and a half my mom has been struggling with Alzheimer's and Dementia, but lately things have gotten way out of control and we had to move her to a place with Assisted living with memory care. We tried everything else but recently we realized we had no other choice to keep her safe. Sad times for the Barakats. 
Even when you know you are doing the right thing it is so hard, especiallywhen the person affected does not know or understand what is happening.

I thought once we moved her I would be relieved and not as stressed - but I guess that will take some time. Right after it happened I was so stressed and had lots of self doubt panic. But God knows what we need when we need it, a lady in  her old building came to the door as I was cleaning out her apt. She was surprised when I answered the door not my mom. She asked where we had moved her and I told her. She was so relieved, said she was so worried about my mom. She said that my mom was forgetting more and more everyday and was afraid for her with the way she was acting. She reassured me that I did the right thing and that this made her so happy because this is what she needs.

Please understand, this is a horrible disease - the forgetting is one thing; we have the same conversations every 10-15 minutes- asking the same questions over and over because she doesn't realize we already talked about it. The paranoia taking over her mind- accusing people of stealing her things when nothing is missing. She stopped eating and told the doctor she wasn't going to - it was a waste of food because she was never hungry. She also refused her meds, the list goes on and on...
I could probably write a book on all the madness.
I would not wish this on anyone.
It's horrible for the person and it's just as devastating for the family.

She has been there one week and she has already gained some weight.
My mom averaged 110-120 most of her life was down to 85! She is now at 87.
She is confused- sometimes she asks what she is doing there and how she got there,
sometimes she thinks it's her old apt as if she's always been there,
sometimes she just wants to go home. She is eating and taking her meds.
We all still have some adjusting to do.
Enjoy your loved ones while you can, I'm just sayin'.

 I used the 1950's Diner set of Gelatos®
1950s diner
 I mixed Gelatos® with modeling paste and used a Clear Scraps stencil.
I used the peach & blood orange Gelatos® mixed with gesso for the skin color.
I used PITT® Artist Pens for journaling and facial features.
The puffy metallic paint is from Viva Decor.

***


Giveaways!


In all of this I forgot to post for a giveaway yesterday
so I am doing it today.
Leave me a comment to win a box of supplies.
( If you are new to my blog click on the pic for details.)
*This will be my final 10 and 20 RAK giveaway*
There will be some cool things in here as after 6 months
of doing these giveaway I have finally given away all my excess
scrap booking supplies!
Not to say I wont have giveaways- you know
I always have something up my sleeve but it will be the last 10 and 20 RAK giveaway.
That being said I will announce a winner on WED since it is later in the day
and I don't want anyone to miss this post.

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